Here now and now here or nowhere

The title of this blog comes from a play on words that "now here" is also the same letters as "nowhere" just with a space added in the middle. I am always trying to get better at being in the here and now, and I've always been a bit of a joker so that is why I chose this name.

Friday, August 10, 2012

Day 15 - Ngapali Beach

The day was hugely uneventful, but that's ok.  It was too sandy, humid, wet and stormy for me to practice yoga but I was able to listen to a meditation recording I have and work on deepening (or really starting) my meditation practice.  I walked around the area for a bit but the heavy rains caused me to get soaked very quickly, also almost everything in the small town was closed.  I did stop in the internet shop for a little and tried to see if it would be possible to get to Sittwe with both the storm system in progress as well as the cultural clash that had been happening. I wasn't able to find too much info out.  I hung out on my bungalow and read a lot.  In the evening I went to the one restaurant that was open and ordered the crab curry, a local specialty. It was beyond amazing.  a plate full of crabs covered in a semi spicy burmese curry, well Rakhine curry to be more specific (a little more flavor than the more bland Burmese curries). Oh, and it cost about $3.75 which was expensive for my usual meals, usually at half that price but I thought I could use a splurge since this was a tourist location.  Possibly the best thing I'd tasted yet.  And I made sure to clean the plate. :)

I watched "Into The Wild" before going to bed and contemplated a lot of things.  Might I die in the next few days in a boat capsizing or during a riot up north. Am I a lot like the main character, escaping society of sorts by constantly traveling and trying to see the world as much as I can on my terms.  The book had a huge impact on me when I read it, and I'd be lying if I said that it didn't help put me on the path to leave my work and travel. It wasn't the catalyst, but it helped in my decision.  Thoughts rushed through my head and I missed home. I felt sad that my constant need to see more and do more put a strain and sadness on my parents who wanted to see and hold me.  I realized that I wanted to be home right now. In a comfortable bed, not being eaten alive by mosquitoes and ants. Very recently I really wanted to be home, to be done with this trip. I think somewhat because I've bought the ticket already and so the end date is close. But also because traveling the way I am in Burma can be very difficult and taxing. When things get tough we want to turn back instead of facing them. But too often we try to face things that we shouldn't just because we don't want to quit.  It's sort of a paradox within itself.  To quit is seen as wrong but to keep going into what we shouldn't go into is also wrong. So what is right?  Of course it's all personal and different and maybe I'm waxing too rhetorical here.  Anyways, the point is that as much as I'm trying to live in the moment. To be present and here. I also and excited to be home with the comforts of modern living.

Tomorrow will find me on a bus back to Tonggook and from there be able to find out if Sittwe is indeed a possibility for me and then onto Mrauk-U. 

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