Here now and now here or nowhere

The title of this blog comes from a play on words that "now here" is also the same letters as "nowhere" just with a space added in the middle. I am always trying to get better at being in the here and now, and I've always been a bit of a joker so that is why I chose this name.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Leaving Bhutan... sadly

well... time flies...

Today is my last full day in Bhutan. I was on contract for a little less than 2.5 months and tomorrow I will fly back to Thailand. It seems like I just got here.  I've gotten used to moving places and then leaving for the next spot, but it never really gets easier. You make new friends and then you separate.  The power of the internet makes it so that touch is easier to keep, but it doesn't mean this is the same as a physical touch.  I made some very nice friends here and hope that I will be able to come back at another time. Bhutan is not an easy place to visit, but as long as I keep a good feeling and positive thinking then maybe I will be able to come back.

Today will be filled with last minute packing, shipping, getting all my Bhutan photos up for this blog and some goodbyes.

I remember when I left Laos a few months back. I wasn't sad up until the plane ride out. I cried a bit and said goodbye in my own way. These feelings never hit me on time. It never occurs to me that I will be going and probably not coming back or seeing these faces again. I feel incredibly selfish at times as I am the one leaving and going on to new and exciting places while the others are still in the same place where a hole as been left by me. It's always easier to be the one leaving then the one staying behind.

So of course I am a bit sentimental today. I have every right to be, don't I?

I've meant for some time to write about how hard it is to have guests leave. I do a lot of work with guests where I will travel with them and teach them yoga along their journey. I become a part of their experience and they become a part of my daily life.  When you spend a week straight with someone, learning all about them and also teaching them in a somewhat intimate setting, it can be very tough to see them off. In remote situations, friendship can form very quickly out of necessity. I remember the friends I made in Mongolia and how quick we became close because you just have to. Be friends or be alone, it's human nature to an extent. So when you make these new friends and they leave to go home, well,  it's hard on the soul. At least for me.  And tomorrow, I am the one who will be leaving.  I will be ok. My friends will be ok. It's all apart of life. But as my parents always said to me as a child... "No one said life was easy."  And this is true, but at least we can do our best to make it easier and more fun. And that is one of the mottoes of my life.

Now I'm off to try to mail a huge box of gifts and some clothes home....

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